Convenient Parenting=Brainwashed Kids

Despite all of our best intentions as parents, too many of us have adopted the TV and other technologies as a convenient distraction, and even as baby-sitters, for our kids. Starting at a very young age, we have set them up in front of a TV program, a video or a video game so that we can ‘get things done,’ instead of spending that time addressing the real-life issues, and teaching our children how to deal with them.  By the time you realize your child has been brainwashed with the skewed values these media outlets offer, it may be too late to reverse.

The recent loss of the Canadian family whose 15 year old son was found dead after running away from home in an outrage because of his parents taking away his Xbox, is proof enough that culture is overriding the authority of parents.  The home should be a place established where teens find their stability and can feel comfortable asking questions, and discussing life issues from school to friends to jobs to the economy, (the latest financial crisis), and parents can instill their values, and prepare them to live accordingly.

Parents simply cannot entrust their kids into the hands of those whose values are warped and unchecked in the name of entertainment. They must not grant the makers of media free access to their young people anymore. In case you haven’t yet noticed, we, as a society, have leapt off the ledge of moral common sense. The days of mindlessly allowing our kids to be transfixed with the media of their choice and the peer pressures of friends are over if we hope to raise this generation with any kind of real moral conscience and wholesome living.

Parenting was never supposed to be easy. No one ever called it simple, effortless or painless.  “But I don’t have time,” a parent may say. “I have so many pressures at work; I am trying to provide for my family.” It’s a seemingly rational explanation, but the question is: Provide your family what? More of the stuff that the media machine is trying to sell? Wouldn’t you rather provide a safe, loving environment to impart your values to your kids? The bottom line: parenting equals sacrifice.

It’s undeniable that as a parent, you will sacrifice something. You can choose to sacrifice up front: time, sleep, career, hobbies while your kids are small. But I guarantee that you will also reap joy and delight as they grow up. You will gain a lifetime of intimately knowing them and the privilege of helping them grow into seasoned, productive, godly adults. If you don’t sacrifice up front, you will sacrifice later. Think about scenarios such as your child getting pregnant (or getting someone pregnant) as a young person, multiple times. Imagine living through your child’s divorce (perhaps several times) and playing the visiting game with divorced in-laws for the rest of your life. Can you picture a 35-year-old couch potato camping out on your futon because he can’t hold down a job?

Teach your kids to be responsible; involve them in your strategy to deal with the financial crisis and they will be prepared for the future. Your kids will be old a lot longer than they are young. I know people in the older generation who have had grown kids causing them misery and regret for their entire adult life. Boy, now that is a sacrifice. Even if you do it for purely selfish reasons, sacrificing up front to spend the needed time with your kids in order to raise them well will protect you from life-long sacrifice. Your children will be the ones leading the nation as the next generation.

Currently our culture is training our kids to value material things.  In the opening hours of Black Friday, a security guard working at a Wal-Mart store in Long Island, N.Y. was killed by a stampede of shoppers and at least four others were injured.

You can protect your kids from the disaster of being shaped by a confused generation of adults selling media, but it will take deliberation. It will take sweat. It will require emotional and mental engagement with your kids, starting when they are at a very young age.

Begin by sitting down with your kids to talk to them about the recent financial crisis.  Teenagers and even children are beginning to feel the stress of the crisis and need the reassurance that your family is a secure place and given practical ways to responsibly participate, starting with teaching them the difference between a need and a want.

You’re the only one who can do it. You are the only one who can be your child’s mom or dad. There are masses of other people who would love to entertain them; there are plenty others who would be glad to take your money for occupying your children’s time and keeping their voices from whining. But you are the only person who can deposit your values into them. You’re the one who has the opportunity to take them on hikes and walks and campouts. You’re the only one who can have long talks about your family history and about what the future holds. Lots of other people can take care of them. Lots of other people can give them food and change their diapers. But you are the only mommy and daddy they will ever have.  Investing quality time into them will build a security that trumps the stress of our financial crisis.

Merely giving birth does not make you a parent. Sacrificing while your children are small, laying down your “deserved” freedoms and deeply thinking about how you’re shaping your children will ensure their lifelong freedom from the chains of slavery to our culture. It’s work, and it’s called loving your children. It’s called being a parent.

This article was adapted from Ron’s book, Re-Create: Building a Culture in Our Homes That Is Stronger Than the Culture Deceiving Our Kids. Look for it at your nearest bookstore, or visit www.battlecry.com for more information.

Ron Luce is the president and founder of Teen Mania Ministries, a Christian organization reaching millions of young people worldwide. He passionately declares the Gospel through Acquire the Fire TV broadcasts, youth events, camps and media resources, challenging teens to take a stand for Christ. www.teenmania.org.